a Mother here...is a Mother anywhere

One night as I am getting ready for dinner I hear someone outside my door calling “Licenca”, which is the Portuguese word for “excuse me” and is often used to get someone’s attention, much like knocking on a door is used in the states.  When I come out, I immediately recognize the woman, who is holding her 6 month old child, as one of my neighbors.  She happens to live right across from me and I see her all the time outside her house playing with her kids, making meals or just chatting with the other mothers.  Her other daughter, who is about 6 years old is one of the neighborhood kids that likes to come over to visit with me. 

My neighbor, who couldn’t be more than 25 years old, proceeds to tell me she is HIV positive and shows me her TARV card (ARV treatment card), which documents the HIV treatment she is currently receiving.  TARV is what ARV’s are called in Mozambique.  ARV’s being the antiretroviral treatment or HIV medicine to slow the progression of the disease.    

After telling me she is HIV positive she then asks me for money to buy her child milk.  She explains that her child is now 6 months and she can longer breastfed her.  Currently, under WHO guidelines, HIV positive mothers can and should breastfeed and only breastfeed, their child until the child reaches 6 months.  After 6 months, a mother could potentially continue to breastfeed but must make sure that the baby only breastfeeds, meaning the baby cannot have another other food or liquids.  Once the baby starts to eat or drink anything else, including water, breastfeeding should be stopped completely. 

I explain to her that I am a volunteer and cannot give out money.  However, I did tell her that I would help her make papas, which is baby food that she can feed her child.  I also made it very clear that she cannot mix breast milk and other food or drink, as that is what seems to cause problems and could put the child at risk for HIV. 

In talking with her, I of course felt sad, frustrated and helpless.  Her reality, being HIV positive with 2 children and not having enough money to buy milk to feed her child, is no doubt challenging and unfair.   

Yet I also came to see another part of her reality.  A reality, that allowed her smile, to laugh and seek help from an unknown American volunteer.  That reality is being a mother. 

I realized that my neighbor isn’t all that different from mothers in the US or anywhere else in the world.  Her reality, her life, is about being a mother.  It is about protecting and caring and loving her children.

In seeing and feeling the love that this woman had for her children, my feelings of hope and inspiration were ignited.  I was reminded of the strength and love that mothers all over the world, in every life situation find within themselves and each other, that ensures that their children grow up happy and healthy.